Number 9

Today I wanted to try something new again, this is still a currently but more in story mode instead of separate pieces. I would love it if you left a comment with what you prefer, this way or the old way? So keep reading for what is up currently. I do have to put up a warning, it is long.

The story of frustration

At times I try to keep my negative feelings away from my blog seeing I get pulling in a dark hole when I keep portraying my life negative and this might sound silly but I want to show you all the good things. But lately I have been getting frustrated at my own body and I have no idea what to do and how to react. I am a health nut and not because it is a trend at blogs but because I want to loose weight and get my body in the best way  as possible. I mentioned this a lot on my blog but sadly enough I have not yet got success. I should start at the beginning for this story. 

I always been a bigger kid but I always been healthy and fit. I was not somebody who ate candy a lot because I do not really feel the need to. I was always running and sporting but still I was 'bigger then the rest' now I can write a long boring story but lets go fast forward to two years ago. That time I decided that I would do everything to loose weight, I went from a rather low intake to even lower and I upped my sports. Nothing happened, I ever gained weight. It was hard because people commented that I should try 'eating less' if I wanted to loose weight, if I ate less it mean I would stop eating. But people saw me like some girl who ate a lot and a lot of unhealthy things....

Going toward last year I complete changed my life for good. I went from unhealthy and low calories to a normal intake and a healthy intake. I made sure I would get everything I needed in calories but also in variation of food. I cut out soda and alcohol complete and tried to take some 'unhealthy / cheat moments' once in a while because I believe a person should also eat things they enjoy from time to time. I started with Zumba, Les Mills combat and other work-outs. But strangely enough I did not loose weight. I went to a dietitian and the only information I got was that I ate perfect and that I should loose weight. Of coarse that did not happen and so I went trough a lot of tests. I can not count the times I got my blood tested. 

The 23st of May I had to give blood to check my cortisol. That was my own decisions and by doctor only approved it. It took a few days to get to the lab and it took till Friday to get my test back. Now starts my tale of frustration, my doctor told me that I had higher then normal cortisol levels. That would mean 'if I take internet as a source of information' that my body has a constant high stress level and that it does not burn calories like a normal body would do. So I had to go to the doctor early in the morning. The nice girl I was dressed up and even put on make-up because I wanted to make a good impression for the handsome new doctor that was replacing my old one. 

He had brilliant news, he had no idea what a high cortisol level ment and I had to explain it. I had to tell him what I wanted 'something that would lower my levels' and he concluded that he would have to ask somebody with more knowledge for information, lets say that takes at least 2 working days. So all in all the last few months I have been doing a lot and 'testing' a lot but not getting anything to help me. So yes it is frustrating and it takes up a big part of my life. A part that I would rather use to improve my blogging and get better articles out. So I hope that somewhere this month I finally get the answers I have been searching for all my life and I can focus on the happier things in life.

Those happy things

One of those happy things I currently have is my vacation. End of Juli and start of August I am leaving for Tirol Austria for 3 weeks. Just me a caravan and a tent. Typical vacation for me with a lot of walking, beachvolleybal and swimming. And a lot of sun. One of the things in Tirol is 'Swarovski World" or as they call it Kristal Welt. I have been excited about going there for weeks now, it is a few rooms full of swarovski art and the largest shop in the world. Can you tell I am excited to go shopping! 
Also there are a lot of mountains where I am going so that means a lot of pictures and hiking up there. I still have to figure out how to get articles online when I am away but I assume working ahead and a bit of help will get me a long way.

Also to go on with the happiness, it is finally WARM AND SUNNY in the Netherlands. People have no idea how long I lusted for this day to happen. I know some people complain because they get warm and sweaty but I live for this weather. Yesterday I went outside with a few pillows and slept in the sun with my kitten beside me. 

And last but not least, I wanted to include the happy moment that is the picture above. A few days ago my hair finally fell in a way that it had volume just because I slept with a damp bun so I am really happy to know how to recreate my volume. 

So this was my currently, do you also want to share what it up with you currently?
Denna

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